In Honor of Susan
When I first met my birthfather, Dr. Bill, he wanted me to meet his daughter very much. He was so proud of her talent. He thought we could bond with our mutual love of performing on stage. Susan was living in Oklahoma City. She was working as a psychologist. So, I called Susan the day after meeting Dr. Bill. I introduced myself and said that I would like to get to know her. Her response was very cold. She said that she frankly had NO desire to know me. That was my first negative reaction from one of my biological family. There were reasons for her response that I did not know or understand at the time.
Years passed without our speaking again. Dr. Bill tragically passed away in a sudden car accident in 2005. I saw her in person for the first time at the funeral. I was very nervous, but, she and her brothers treated me kindly. They allowed me to sit with the family. We rode in the family car.
I got the information to contact Susan. She had moved to Ohio by this time. I called her and we had a nice and civil talk. I reminded her of our first talk. She did not remember saying that to me. However, she did explain her feelings. She had been extremely hurt by her father's betrayal of her mother when he divorced her to marry his nurse, Anne. Then to have me show up was a stark reminder that Dr. Bill had cheated on Maxine. So with that in mind, I could very much understand her first response to my call in the beginning of my reunion with the family. She still had some hurt and pain from our father's actions. I will say that I found it interesting. I was grateful that I did not grow up knowing Dr. Bill. I had no ill feelings toward him when he passed. For me, he was nothing, but, a eccentric kind older man that I loved dearly.
After this conversation, Susan and I developed a comfortable friendship. We spoke infrequently, however, I enjoyed our talks. After moving to Ohio, she gave up her practice and began performing on stage. She starred in several musicals around the area. I was very proud of her talent. She was born exactly 10 years before me. Now, she was living out her dream of performing. I dreamed of singing with her at some point.
This summer, my dream of performing with her came to an end. I awoke one morning to discover a FB post saying that she had an advanced stage of ALS. I was shocked and dismayed. I cared for patients with this disease, so I knew what this would mean for her. I called her and spoke to her husband. I was not able to speak to her because she had lost the ability to speak due to the disease. The following week, on the day that I wrote about it being the anniversary of my first speaking to my birthmother, I learned from FB that Susan passed away. My heart was broken.
Though Susan and I would never be like sisters raised together, I was glad to have known her. I hope she is singing and dancing again in heaven with Dr. Bill and Maxine.
I created this video from pictures from her Facebook page. Sadly, I do not have any of us together. The link is to the video on YouTube.
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